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The Espy

The Espy

A rich beer and smoke smell permeates the very fabric of this notorious dive. Drugged wildlife add to the charm, whilst the low light levels and ugly bar fittings enhance the incredible ambiance of this historic boozer cum music venue. The threadbare carpet with requisite gaffer tape and butts is just as expected, the beer is cold and the music is hot. And the beach is close if you need to sleep off your hangover. Even some of the local sleazebags avoid this place because it is just too sleazy! The beautiful building is of great historic and cultural significance.
The URL below is not their official website, but close.

Petit

Petit Bar

The place used to be an underground bowling alley, but is now rebuild into a bar which explain it's oblong shape.

The lighting and toilets is as bad as you can expect from a sleazy bar.

It's worth a visit...

Hotel Esplanada

Dili is quite a backwater and the Hotel Esplanada helps a lot. Hotel Esplanada is a two story building with the entire top floor an open air bar. That is better than it sounds since local mosquitos carry dengue fever and malaria so bring your repellant. Still, its a great place to see the expat community and UN workers. The Hotel Espalanada is one the waterfront in Dili, not too far from the Korean Embassy. There are no identifiable street numbers there nor many street names so this will have to do. The sea view is worth it and the company is great.

Johnny Volt says check it out.

Oasis

Putrid toilets usually. Loud off-key caterwauling from drunken patrons attempting Karioke on some nights. Also have live bands occasionally.
The best music is usually found on the jukebox. Talent Scouts from Nashville occasionally frequent here, but usually on nights when the bikers & their wannabes are sparse. I don't recommend any food here. Be forewarned = you take your chances of joining the "Disease of the Month Club" if you take home an easy free pickup partner from here.

Bill's Bar

I remember my dad taking me there when I was little and he place is exactly the same. Bill's bar hasn't changed in almost 35 years. Two stinky bathrooms, no food, beer can sculptures behind the bar.

The patrons (and that being kind) are a mix of druggies, drunks and derilicts.

The place usally closes around 5 am and opens around 11am. There was one time when one of the drunks had his head down on the bar, they thought he was sleeping, when they went to wake him they found that he was dead! He had been there for a couple of hours and no one noticed. The beer on tap is cheap and cold, and the bartenders friendly. A great place for people watching.

The Yale

The Yale

There are a lot of "Blues" Bars around the world, but the creepiest, dankest, most-ready-for-demolition and, therefor, one of the best is the old Yale bar in downtown Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada.

This dimly lit brick building would surely become a mass grave in the event of the predicted "Big One" earthquake that experts say is due any time now, and the musicians try their best to emulate said big one with the shear volume of their playing. You can walk in perfectly capable of hearing birds sing, and leave with as much audible ability as a granite boulder. The compensation for this is the fact that these guys not only play LOUD, they also play exceedingly well. Read more »

Big Jer's Titanic

Overlooking the Carribean Sea and central market. Forty-five minutes from Guatemala. American and Belizian food. Cold beer and mixed drinks with friendly people. Local information center.

Random bars

Rocky's Downtown

Your quintessential hole-in-the-wall. Billed as the 'oldest bar in Granite City that hasn't burned down yet'. Located in the maw of a steel city, this bar has the unique distinction of having scum-of-the-earth clientele coupled with the presence of the usually yuppie-associated NTN Trivia. High scores rarely top 10,000 points.

Homeless fun-seekers and talking-to-themselves winos provide endless free entertainment, therefore no bands blemish the weekends. The owners of this establishment apparently came to the conclusion that having dollar longneck specials three weekdays in a row would boost attendance. And boy howdy it did. Read more »

Doug & Marty's Boar House

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The Boar House is so sleazy that you can even lose respectable friends by just mentioning that you have been there, or intend going.

They serve a range of imported beers, and some cheaper local Russian beers too. There is also a range of American-style food.

If you are very unlucky, an ex-pat will corner you (and this is the favourite ex-pat bar in Moscow) and bore you to death with one of two topics: (a) "Russian women - have you noticed how they have two legs and two arms? I am so sexually aroused by them OR (b) "I hate this ********* city, my company sent me here, I am earning a huge salary but blame my complete social inadequacy and friendless status on Moscow - rather than my natural inadequacies". It is worth moving away if cornered in this way. Read more »

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IMO

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In my opinion IMO is definitely the sleaziest in the northwestern part of italy. On the outside it appears to
be a cheap wine retailer on a dark, non-descriptive square
in a degraded part of town, locked inside a grid of popular housing, a smelly river, a porno-theater.

Au contraire, IMO is open til late nights (sometimes) and the atmosphere is genuine. The drinks are extraordinarily cheap, service is "as is", meaning that ima (the owner's, imo, wife) will stare at you and mechanichally reach for
whatever you were drinking last. No point in asking as she appareantly will not understand and imo himself is too busy playing a game of "scopone".
Last time I checked a glass of wine was still under 20 euro cents and the collection of rare sub-brand liquors was
still intact. Read more »

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Blue Light

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The Blue Light is on Western a little North of Belmont. It is fantastically sleazy. They have a late license and open at 7 every morning. It's the kind of place that looks like you'll get beat up in there, but you won't (unless you ask for it, in which case, please stay out).

Hipsters are discovering it, so go now before it's too late, even if you yourself are a hipster. For now, it's always possible to find a spot to sit, even at 2:30 when all the other late night places are packed. You may have to walk to the back room, though.

It's a good place to go after Hungry Brain (2319 W. Belmont) closes at 2, when you're not done drinking.

Miami

Miami

Recommended by "friends who know", located at 3831 St-Laurent, a place with loads of regulars, and more alcohol per dollar than in many other places around the area. Quoting from another review (see link) and confirmed by the "friends who know", "Melissa Auf Der Maur of Smashing Pumpkins and Rufus Wainwright were both regulars when they lived here."

Brigadun

Brigadun

It is open until very late.
I have only entered the bar after 4 o´clock at night, when the shutters are already partly closed.
I don´t remember much details, I do vaguely seem to remember both men and women are present and in general
the atmosphere is friendly.
As such, it is not very sleazy, but since it´s open till late I guess it deserves mentioning. Next time I´ll
try to pay more attention.

Berghain

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Berghain is a Berlin nightclub, named after its location on the border between Kreuzberg and Friedrichshain.

Philip Sherburne has described it as "quite possibly the current world capital of techno. The club is located in a former power plant in Friedrichshain, behind the Berlin Ostbahnhof railway station. Read more »