Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.
The Village Idiot
One of the top sleazy bars going. Serves Pabst cans for $1.75, and this is Manhattan! You can also find PBR on tap!Its on the corner of 14th and 9th.
The scantily-clad, gorgeous bartenders will do shots with the patrons, when they're not hosing each other down with soda water. They will also pour liquor down your throat while standing on the bar.
I almost hate to put this review in, because now its going to be more packed than usual, but it deserves the credit. This is the top place in the city, bar none.